“Hope is the denial of reality.” -Margaret Weis
Are you in a relationship and asking yourself, “Is this relationship over?” The mere fact that you are asking yourself this question is your answer. And, 99% of the time, if you are asking this question, the answer is probably a resounding, Yes!
Unless you are in a relationship with someone who is an equal partner and says they want things to work out, or more importantly actually works at working things out, then you are in for an uphill battle and you know it.
And, don’t kid yourself, you know when your relationship is over; when you feel bad most of the time, when you cry more than laugh, when you are constantly fighting with no resolve, when you are the only one trying to make things work, when you second guess everything you say and do and when you start asking yourself if you should stay or go?
The problem arises when you know the answer but choose to live in denial and when wanting a relationship becomes more important than wanting happiness. If you find yourself in an unhealthy, unhappy relationship and all of the crying, screaming, pleading, praying and trying isn’t changing a thing, then it’s time to face reality.
If you choose to hide your head in the sand and continue to ignore all of the signs that’s fine, but don’t cry because you’re miserable. Remember, you chose to look the other way. But if you face this situation head on and tell yourself the truth, then you can begin to accept the fact that it’s time to start working on Plan B.
It may not be what you want to do, it may not be how you’ve always dreamed it would be and it certainly isn’t what you signed up for but it’s what you’ve got and now you have to make some hard decisions about your life and how you want to live it going forward.
Now is the time to “get real” with yourself. Ask yourself if this is really what you’ve always wanted? Does this person enhance your life or make your life worse? Are you a better person for knowing them? And, if this were your son or daughter, is this the kind of relationship you hope they find some day?
So, if you are wondering, “Is your relationship over?” Love yourself enough to be honest with yourself and then dig down and find the courage to take the first step forward into your new life and some day when you’re through the worst of it you will be so glad you did.
Are you trying to pick up the pieces of your broken heart? Susan Russo is an author and coach who has helped people from around the world move beyond heartache and pain after their breakup or divorce. Would you like to heal your heartache sooner rather than later?